Woman deletes Instagram during fertility struggle, then discovers an unexpected downside

Deleting Instagram gave one woman some relief while she was struggling with infertility, but it also exposed an uncomfortable reality about how much modern friendships can depend on social media.

The woman shared her experience on Reddit in a post titled “I deleted my Instagram and now I don’t exist anymore.” The post received more than 3,700 upvotes and prompted other users to describe what happened when they stepped away from social media.

The Reddit user, posting under the name niccals12d3, said she had reached a point where seeing pregnancy announcements and baby-related posts had become too difficult.

“I couldn’t bear any more announcements or baby-related content.”

She ultimately deleted Instagram for what she described as her own sanity.

Why she left Instagram

For many people, Instagram is an easy way to keep up with friends and family. But that same stream of updates can become emotionally difficult when someone is dealing with a major personal challenge.

For this woman, infertility had made pregnancy announcements and baby content particularly painful. She also said she had become frustrated with the platform itself.

“Reels ruined my brain,”

she wrote.

Stepping away from Instagram helped her escape content she no longer wanted to see and, by her account, improved her mental well-being.

But there was a tradeoff she hadn't expected.

“I don’t exist anymore”

After deleting Instagram, the woman said she began to feel increasingly disconnected from her friends.

“The huge downside is that I am completely cut out of my friend’s life,”

she wrote.

She said she had tried to compensate by reaching out to people herself, but felt that the effort was largely one-sided.

“I have been trying to be more proactive and reach out to my friends more but I feel like it is very one sided. I know I did it myself, but I wish it was different.”

Her experience highlights a problem that is easy to overlook: leaving social media can protect someone's peace while simultaneously removing one of the main channels through which their social circle communicates.

Instagram may not be the friendship itself, but for some groups it has become part of the infrastructure around those friendships. Photos, messages, event invitations, life updates and casual interactions can all happen there. Someone who leaves may not be deliberately excluded, yet can still miss much of what is happening.

What does research say about social media and mental health?

The woman's experience comes as researchers continue to examine the relationship between social media use and mental health.

A 2025 Pew Research report found that half of U.S. adults say they use Instagram, making it the only other platform in the survey besides Facebook used by at least half of American adults.

Other research has also found associations between heavy social media use and depression. A study by researchers at the University of Cincinnati and Northwestern University analyzed 11 years of data from the annual Media Behaviors and Influence Study, beginning in 2014.

The researchers reported that social media use was among the stronger predictors of self-reported depression in their analysis. They also observed a relationship between depression and social media use at roughly 2.5 hours of daily scrolling.

That finding should not be interpreted as proof that scrolling causes depression. Studies identifying associations can show that two factors are related, but they do not necessarily establish that one directly causes the other.

For someone already dealing with infertility or another emotionally difficult experience, however, reducing exposure to distressing content may still be a reasonable personal choice.

Other Reddit users described the same problem

The woman's post resonated with other Reddit users who had reduced or eliminated their social media use.

One commenter said social media had become exhausting and that they had kept Reddit while abandoning other platforms.

Another said they had spent almost two years mostly off social media and eventually noticed that their fear of missing out had diminished.

“Eventually I realized that if people can only connect with others via an [Instagram] post, that’s not a me problem.”

A third commenter offered a different perspective. They said they had stayed away from social media for more than a year and initially felt that close friends had stopped reaching out. Over time, though, they became comfortable with being offline.

They eventually returned to social media to promote a new business and said the experience quickly pulled them back into old habits, including doomscrolling and feeling worse afterward.

Their advice was simple: be careful about returning if leaving social media has been helpful.

The harder question: Is Instagram the problem, or has it become the social connection?

There may not be a single right answer.

For some people, deleting Instagram can create valuable distance from an endless stream of comparisons, announcements and algorithmically selected content. For others, leaving without replacing those connections can produce genuine isolation.

The distinction matters.

If Instagram is causing distress, deleting the app isn't necessarily the only option. Someone might instead mute pregnancy-related accounts, limit notifications, remove the app from their phone, set a daily usage limit or use direct messaging and other channels to stay connected with specific people.

Likewise, friends can make an effort to maintain relationships outside the platform. A phone call, text message, group chat or face-to-face invitation can replace much of what social media was doing without requiring someone to remain on an app they find harmful.

The Reddit discussion ultimately points to an uncomfortable tension in modern social life: sometimes the platform you need a break from is also the platform that keeps you connected to everyone else.

For the woman who deleted Instagram, stepping away appears to have helped with one problem while creating another. Her experience suggests that leaving social media may work best when it is paired with a deliberate plan for maintaining the relationships that matter offline.

The publication said it could not independently verify the details of the Reddit user's account.